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No material of an erotic nature should be presented to children or young people of any age, individually or in a group. Children will thus come to marriage with that realistic wisdom about which Saint Paul speaks when he teaches that husband and wife must continually give way to one another in love, cherishing one another with mutual patience and affection (cf. In all cases, their right to be present during classes cannot be denied. In such a situation, many Catholic parents turn to the Church to take up the task of providing guidance and suggestions for educating their children, especially in the phase of childhood and adolescence. Such catechesis must not include the more intimate aspects of sexual information, whether biological or affective, which belong to individual formation within the family. "The human body, with its sex, and its masculinity and femininity, seen in the very mystery of creation, is not only a source of fruitfulness and procreation, as in the whole natural order, but includes right ?from the beginning' the ?nuptial' attribute, that is, the capacity of expressing love: that love precisely in which the man-person becomes a gift and — by means of this gift — fulfils the very meaning of his being and existence". Children and young people should be encouraged to have esteem for, and to practise self-control and restraint, to live in an orderly way, to make personal sacrifices in a spirit of love for God, self-respect, and generosity towards others, without stifling feelings and tendencies, but channeling them into a virtuous life. These occupy the time for children and young people. In some societies today, there are planned and determined attempts to impose premature sex information on children. 18. In a family where love reigns, this gift is always understood as part of the call to self-giving in love for God and for others. On the contrary, parents must educate their own children to understand and face up to the forces of this culture, so that they may always follow the way of Christ. 21. The Holy Father adds, "In view of the close links between the sexual dimension of the person and his or her ethical values, education must bring the children to a knowledge of and respect for the moral norms as the necessary and highly valuable guarantee for responsible personal growth in human sexuality". Although this task is always important, it becomes especially so in this period of their children's life: "Therefore, in the life of each member of the lay faithful there are particularly significant and decisive moments for discerning God's call...Among these are the periods of adolescence and young adulthood". In this way, the bond of mutual love, to which parents bear witness before their children, will safeguard their affective serenity. 51. Chastity makes the personality harmonious. Truth shapes how to show love. Therefore, it must be stressed that education for chastity is inseparable from efforts to cultivate all the other virtues and, in a particular way, Christian love, characterized by respect, altruism and service, which after all is called charity. Neither the children nor other members of their family should ever be penalized or discriminated against for this decision. This charge is not a simple moral exhortation, but an undeniable requirement arising from the mystery of the Church". 92. Here’s a truth you can speak in love: God loves you.He loves you so much that He thought creation would not be complete without one of you. This was reiterated by Pope John Paul II: "The Second Vatican Council has significantly spoken on the universal call to holiness. 129. 91. "Parents, teachers and all who are in any way concerned in the education of boys and young men ought to train them in such a way that they will know the solicitude of the Lord for his flock and be alive to the needs of the Church. Therefore, in every condition and state of life, this gift comes to be ever more wondrous by redeeming grace, through which we become "partakers of the divine nature" (2 Peter 1:4) and are called to live the supernatural communion of love together with God and with our brothers and sisters. In this atmosphere of prayer and awareness of the presence and fatherhood of God, the truths of faith and morals should be taught, understood and deeply studied with reverence, and the Word of God should be read and lived with love. They must insist on the positive value of chastity and its capacity to generate true love for other persons. Therefore, in catechesis and the formation given both within and outside of the family, the Church's teaching on the sublime value of virginity and celibacy must never be lacking, but also the vocational meaning of marriage, which a Christian can never regard as only a human venture. Thus the authorities of the Church are to judge whether local customs are compatible with Christian morality. 38. 68. Elio Sgreccia Titular Bishop of Zama Minor Secretary of the Pontifical Council for the Family. 24. Especially when the practice of homosexual acts has not become a habit, many cases can benefit from appropriate therapy. 108. From this it follows that in order to educate in chastity, "self-control is necessary, which presupposes such virtues as modesty, temperance, respect for self and for others, openness to one's neighbour". 4. In fact, a characteristic of this period of development is an attraction toward intellectual activities. Here are presented only some of the more widely diffused methods that threaten the rights of parents and the moral life of their children. 117. While the family is rich in these strengths, it also needs the support of the State and society, according to the principle of subsidiarity: "It can happen...that when a family does decide to live up fully to its vocation, it finds itself without the necessary support from the State and without sufficient resources. 86. 20. Necessary and supernaturally effective help is provided by the Sacrament of Reconciliation, especially if a regular confessor is available. 113. Parents, as individuals or in associations, have the right and duty to promote the good of their children and demand from the authorities laws that prevent and eliminate the exploitation of the sensitivity of children and adolescents. Certainly "the changes that have taken place within almost all modern societies demand that not only the family but also society and the Church should be involved in the effort of properly preparing young people for their future responsibilities". Some particularly significant moments for young people are also when they enter the working world or higher education, moments when they come into contact with different behaviour models and occasions that represent a real personal challenge — a brusque contact at times, but a potentially beneficial one. Aware of this family dimension of education for love and for living one's own sexuality properly and conscious of the unique "experience of humanity" of the community of believers, our Council wishes to put forward pastoral guidelines, drawing on the wisdom which comes from the Word of the Lord and the values which illuminate the teaching of the Church. of this nature, (c) seeking personal information about sexual questions or asking that family information be divulged, (d) oral or written exams about genital or erotic questions. It is not easy for parents to take on this educational commitment because today it appears to be rather complex, and greater than what the family could offer, also because, in most cases, it is not possible to refer to what one's own parents did in this regard. Therefore, in talks with children, suitable advice should always be given regarding how to grow in the love of God and one's neighbour, and how to overcome any difficulties: "These means are: discipline of the senses and the mind, watchfulness and prudence in avoiding occasions of sin, the observance of modesty, moderation in recreation, wholesome pursuits, assiduous prayer and frequent reception of the Sacraments of Penance and the Eucharist. The discovery of the wonders of creation which accompanies this phase and the experiences in this regard at home and in school should also be oriented towards the stages of catechesis and preparation for the sacraments which takes place within the ecclesial community. Instruction for both girls and boys should aim at pointing out the beauty of motherhood and the wonderful reality of procreation, as well as the deep meaning of virginity. Nevertheless, it must be kept in mind that the parents' mission does not end when their children come of legal age which, in any case, varies according to different cultures and laws. Young people need to be helped to distinguish between the concepts of what is normal and abnormal, between subjective guilt and objective disorder, avoiding what would arouse hostility. A society of ?things' and not of ?persons'. Boys should be discouraged from becoming overly aggressive or too concerned about physical prowess as proof of their virility. Thus the family comes to be recognized as an inseparable part of the vocation to marriage. 14. For parents by themselves are not capable of satisfying every requirement of the whole process of raising children, especially in matters concerning their schooling and the entire gamut of socialization. Therefore, above all, we wish to tie this help for parents to fundamental content about the truth and meaning of sex, within the framework of a genuine and rich anthropology. As the Encyclical Humanae Vitae states, such love "reveals its true nature and nobility when it is considered in its supreme origin, God, who is love (cf. Positive information about sexuality should always be part of a formation plan so as to create the Christian context in which all information about life, sexual activity, anatomy and hygiene is given. In this way, in the light of the principles and content of this guide, they must enter "into the same spirit that animates parents". 60. A distinction must be made between a tendency that can be innate and acts of homosexuality that "are intrinsically disordered" and contrary to Natural Law. As the Encyclical Humanae Vitae affirms, married love has four characteristics: it is human love (physical and spiritual), it is total, faithful and fruitful love. Song of Songs 1-8; Hosea 2; Jeremiah 3: 1-3; Ezekial 23, etc.) "Married people are called to live conjugal chastity; others practise chastity in continence". For a Christian conscience and a vision of marriage and the family, St. Paul's recommendation to the Philippians holds for every type of vocation: "...whatever is true, whatever is honourable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellency, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things" (Philippians 4:8). 1. At the same time, parents will have to be able to help their children to channel their anxieties and aspirations correctly, and teach them to reflect on the reality of things and how to reason. Such diversity, linked to the complementarity of the two sexes, allows thorough response to the design of God according to the vocation to which each one is called". When he deals with sexual education in Familiaris Consortio, this is why Pope John Paul II affirms: "Indeed Christian parents, discerning the signs of God's call, will devote special attention and care to education in virginity or celibacy as the supreme form of that self-giving that constitutes the very meaning of human sexuality". Among the many difficulties parents encounter today, despite different social contexts, one certainly stands out: giving children an adequate preparation for adult life, particularly with regard to education in the true meaning of sexuality. The Speaking the Truth in Love conference is hosted by Richard Caldwell, Pastor-Teacher of Founders Baptist Church in Houston, TX, and founder of Walking in Grace Ministries. In particular, profound respect must be maintained for the difference between man and woman which reflects the love and fruitfulness of God himself. Children who have this experience are better disposed to live according to those moral truths that they see practiced in their parents' life. Sexual violence with regard to children is not infrequent. 99. We are aware of the difficulty and often the impossibility for parents to participate fully in all supplementary instruction provided outside the home. 56. The truly Christian family will also be able to communicate an understanding of the value of celibacy to unmarried children or those who are incapable of marriage for reasons apart from their own will. In this noble task, may parents always place their trust in God through prayer to the Holy Spirit, the gentle Paraclete and Giver of all good gifts. One cannot give what one does not possess. This is a self-giving made to one who loves us, a self-giving whose inherent goodness is discovered and activated in the communion of persons and where one learns the value of loving and of being loved. 4. Parents should stress that Christians are called to live the gift of sexuality according to the plan of God who is Love, i.e., in the context of marriage or of consecrated virginity and also celibacy. The Christian family is capable of offering an atmosphere permeated with that love for God that makes an authentic reciprocal gift possible. This happens above all in contraception and artificial procreation. Alfonso Card. It is important for parents to take their children's needs into consideration during the different stages of development. In an age when the mystery has been taken from human sexuality, parents must take care to avoid trivializing human sexuality, in their teaching and in the help offered by others. In our empirically-based theory, the Sound Relationship House , we describe what couples in the good enough relationship do and have. 145. In the face of many challenges to Christian chastity, the gifts of nature and grace which parents enjoy always remain the most solid foundations on which the Church forms her children. 144. To love the Lord implies responding positively to his commandments: "If you love me, you will keep my commandments" (John 14:15). 128. (a) In later adolescence, young people can first be introduced to the knowledge of the signs of fertility and then to the natural regulation of fertility, but only in the context of education for love, fidelity in marriage, God's plan for procreation and respect for human life. In this way they will be prepared when the Lord calls to answer generously with the prophet: ?Here am I! Frequently parents are not lacking in awareness and effort, but they are quite alone, defenceless and often made to feel they are wrong. However, when parents seek help from others, there are various useful methods which can be recommended in the light of parental experience and in conformity with Christian prudence. May parents constantly rely on the love which they offer to their own children, a love which "casts out fear", which "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (1 Corinthians 13:7). Therefore, four general principles will be proposed and afterwards the various stages in a child's development will be examined. Children, adolescents and young people should be taught how to enter into healthy relationships with God, with their parents, their brothers and sisters, with their companions of the same or the opposite sex, and with adults. This principle of timing has already been presented in the study of the various phases of the development of children and young people. This is particularly true for the moral and spiritual education on such a delicate matter as chastity. Video is created for worship use. Truth Philosophers are interested in a constellation of issues involving the concept of truth. 66. Nevertheless, in spite of the rising number of divorces and the growing crisis of the family, they should respond with optimism, committing themselves to give their children a deep Christian formation to make them able to overcome various difficulties. 32. With the same formula, spouses commit themselves and promise to be "faithful forever" because their fidelity really flows from this communion of persons which is rooted in the plan of the Creator, in Trinitarian Love and in the Sacrament which expresses the faithful union between Christ and the Church. The main methods to avoid will also be indicated, together with the ideologies that promote and inspire them. As the Catechism of the Catholic Church says, sexuality "becomes personal and truly human when it is integrated into the relationship of one person to another, in the complete and mutual lifelong gift of a man and a woman". No one should ever be invited, let alone obliged, to act in any way that could objectively offend against modesty or which could subjectively offend against his or her own delicacy or sense of privacy. 140. It also deals with growth in the Christian virtues and developing the capacity for self-giving in the vocation of one's own life. As we will later observe, virginal and married love are the two forms in which the person's call to love is fulfilled. Moreover, this information does not take into account the different stages of formation and development of children and young people, and it is influenced by a distorted individualistic concept of freedom, in an ambience lacking the basic values of life, human love and the family. In the context of formation in chastity, "fatherhood-motherhood" also includes one parent who is left alone and adoptive parents. During this stage of development, children are normally at ease with their body and its functions. Love is therefore the fundamental and innate vocation of every human being". As a union between professed faith and concrete life, inculturization means creating a harmonious relationship between faith and culture, where Christ and his Gospel have absolute precedence over culture. We invite you to join us on January 22–24, 2021 to be part of this important event. No one can deny the justification for this when the means are lacking, to develop and use to advantage the free time of the young and to direct their energies". Children's Principal Stages of Development. Since parents know, understand and love each of their children in their uniqueness, they are in the best position to decide what the appropriate time is for providing a variety of information, according to their children's physical and spiritual growth. 1. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained". However, the values clarification method impedes the true freedom and autonomy of young people at an insecure stage of their development. Ephesians 6:12). As Pope Paul VI wrote shortly after the Council: "This strong invitation to holiness could be regarded as the most characteristic element in the whole Magisterium of the Council, and so to say, its ultimate purpose". All of these aspects are connected to an awareness, albeit implicit, of the dignity of the human person, called to collaborate with God and, at the same time, marked by fragility. Unfortunately this does not change the fact that in some countries especially there are many shows and publications abounding in all sorts of violence with a kind of bombardment of messages that undermine moral principles and make it impossible to achieve a serious climate in which values worthy of the human person may be transmitted". The self-giving that inspires the love of husband and wife for each other is the model and norm for the self-giving that must be practised in the relationships between brothers and sisters and the different generations living together in the family. Male and female in their physical constitution, the two human subjects, even though physically different, share equally in the capacity to live in truth and love. This subject must be presented only in terms of chastity, health and "the truth about human sexuality in its relationship to the family as taught by the Church". Once the objectives of the information to be provided have been identified, the time and ways must be specified, starting from childhood. Moreover, the vocation to the consecrated life always finds its meaning in self-giving, sustained by a special grace, the gift of oneself "to God alone with an undivided heart in a remarkable manner" in order to serve him more fully in the Church. But … Before going into the practical details of young people's formation in chastity, it is extremely important for parents to be aware of their rights and duties, particularly in the face of a State or a school that tends to take up the initiative in the area of sex education. Welcome to [truth]LINK What you're about to discover is that God is more beautiful than you've ever imagined. No one is capable of giving moral education in this delicate area better than duly prepared parents. This implies the legitimacy and indeed the need of giving assistance to the parents, but finds its intrinsic and absolute limit in their prevailing right and their actual capabilities. Four Working Principles and Their Particular Norms. Even if they are socially acceptable, some habits of speech and conduct are not morally correct and represent a way of trivializing sexuality, reducing it to a consumer object. But, at this stage of development, children are still not capable of fully understanding the value of the affective dimension of sexuality. They will thus be able to offer their own experience and wisdom in order to help others educate their children for chastity. Man's need for truth and love opens him both to God and to creatures: it opens him to other people, to life in communion, and in particular to marriage and to the family". It is recommended that parents associate with other parents, not only in order to protect, maintain or fill out their own role as the primary educators of their children, especially in the area of education for love, but also to fight against damaging forms of sex education and to ensure that their children will be educated according to Christian principles and in a way that is consonant with their personal development. 127. This right is further qualified by a child's stage of development, his or her capacity to integrate moral truth with sexual information, and by respect for his or her innocence and tranquility. With regard to these immoral situations that contradict the meaning of giving in marriage, it is also good to recall that: "The two dimensions of conjugal union, the unitive and the procreative, cannot be artificially separated without damaging the deepest truth of the conjugal act itself". Love includes the human body, and the body is made a sharer in spiritual love". Such love is and must be aimed towards eternity, towards the unending happiness promised by Our Lord Jesus Christ to those who follow him: "Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God" (Matthew 5:8). This principle of respect for the child excludes all improper forms of involving children and young people. Elder Alan R. Walker: ‘The Gospel Light of Truth and Love’ General Authority Seventy Elder Alan R. Walker, a General Authority Seventy, speaks during the Sunday afternoon session of the 191st Annual General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on April 4, 2021. Being truthful takes Strength And Courage and many of us find it challenging as being dishonest is sometimes the easier route to take. Parents who carry out their own right and duty to form their children for chastity can be certain that they are helping them in turn to build stable and united families, thus anticipating, insofar as this is possible, the joys of paradise: "How can I ever express the happiness of the marriage that is joined together by the Church, strengthened by an offering, sealed by a blessing, announced by angels and ratified by the Father....They are both brethren and both fellow servants; there is no separation between them in spirit or flesh....Christ rejoices in them and he sends them his peace; where the couple is, there he is also to be found, and where he is, evil can no longer abide". Such information tends to shatter their emotional and educational development and to disturb the natural serenity of this period of life. The Vocation to Virginity and Celibacy. The practice of decency and modesty in speech, action and dress is very important for creating an atmosphere suitable to the growth of chastity, but this must be well motivated by respect for one's own body and the dignity of others. "The duty of fostering vocations falls on the whole Christian community....The greatest contribution is made by families which are animated by a spirit of faith, charity and piety and which provide, as it were, a first seminary, and by parishes in whose abundant life the young people themselves take an active part". Parents should avoid adopting the widespread mentality whereby girls are given every recommendation regarding virtue and the value of virginity, while the same is not required for boys, as if everything were licit for them. 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